Night-time Drive Thru

*A little device we use every now and again to speed up Henry's sometimes excruciatingly-long bedtime ritual:

I sit on a bench; Henry ooches up to me on his little yellow scooter car.

Me: Hello, sir. Welcome to the Night-Time Drive Thru. Can I take your order?

Henry: What do you have?

Me: Tonight you can chose either the Self-Serve package, or our limited-time offer of a Full-Serve, All-inclusive Bedtime package.

Henry: What's that mean?

Me: That means I do everything.

Henry: I'll take that.

Me: Scoot through to the next window, please.

He scoots around and pulls up to the other side of the bench.

Me: Let's start with PJs. We have a delightful pair with a Racing Car motif I think you'd like.

Henry: Yes, please.

Me: Arms up, sir.

He obliges. The PJs are on within a minute.

Me: And for your dental hygiene, do you mind strawberry-flavoured toothpaste?

Henry: No.

He opens. I brush.

Me: I have a warm cloth for your face.

He closes his eyes. I wash.

Me: Excellent. I see here your account is pre-paid, so that's good. I'll just give you your complimentary hug (we hug), and you can drive up to the couch where a nice lady is waiting to read you the book of your choice.

Henry: Thanks, Daddy.

Me: Not at all, Cornbread. Come again.


Unknown said...

So what would the longer version of this be?

Unknown said...

Good lord, you don't have children.

Me: Get your PJs on, please.

Him: No!

Me: Please?

Him: No!

(repeat 40 times)

Tanya said...

What a great idea!! I will have to remember this next time I have bedtime struggles! Congrats on Jake by the way!